I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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