if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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