Non-Jews are for practice
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Couch. On fire.
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