I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.