Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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