none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize