Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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