your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
