i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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