Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
