ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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