you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
