I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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