im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
