she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
