Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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