Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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