last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
