But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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