But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Houston, we have a blender
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
