Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I am puke
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
