I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I need mimosas to revive my soul
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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