i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
