i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
