That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
