It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
