All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
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She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
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I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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