Please, let me fuck your mom
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
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