i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bit a glass in half.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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