I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize