never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
