i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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