Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
