How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
