Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
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