Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
