I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
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