You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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