Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
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she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
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We talked him into tasing himself.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
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