Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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