I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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