This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
