the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
