bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
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dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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