you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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