I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize