I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize