member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
