What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize
