i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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