Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
