We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
